Walking in my shoes
by mandyg67
Summary: After learning of the plane crash, Owen and Amelia talk about Meredith. Amelia and Meredith learn what happened to Derek in DC.
1. Chapter 1

Alex came in to the O.R. where Amelia and Hunt were working on a crash victim. "Hunt, I just wanted to let you know that both Meredith and Arizona are off duty. It's too hard for them to work on the plane crash victims. There's gotta be a rule. People who have been in a plane crash shouldn't work on one."

"That should be okay. Let April know. We may need to call some other doctors in."

"I know Arizona lost her leg in the crash, but why shouldn't Meredith be working on the plane crash victims?" asked Amelia.

"Didn't Derek tell you about the plane crash?"

"I know Mark died, and Derek's arm was injured. Lizzie gave him her nerves to fix it. I was pretty out of it at the time of the crash. But Meredith was fine."

"Not today, I think. You can get post-tramautic shock even if you're not physically hurt, believe me. The accident was traumatic for her. She lost her sister, Lexie. They were stuck in the woods for four nights, trying to keep Mark , Arizona, and the pilot alive while animals tried to devour Lexie's body. I wouldn't be surprised if this brings back bad memories, maybe even PTSD, for both Arizona and Meredith."

"Meredith and Derek don't talk about it."

"There's a lot they don't talk about."

Later that day, while Owen and Amelia were grabbing lunch in his office, Amelia volunteered, "Yesterday, Meredith tried to warn me off you. She told me that Cristina asked her to look out for you."

"Meredith and I have a complicated relationship. I don't think she ever thought I was good enough for Cristina. She certainly thought I shouldn't have married her when she was suffering from PTSD. And she was right."

"Well, I told her keep out of my life. I told her what I see and what I do is none of her business. That she doesn't know me. She's never lost the loss of her love. She's never cried over the body of the person she loved the most. Until you've had to walk in my shoes, she needs to cut me some slack."

"You told her that she hadn't lost the love of her life?"

"Right, she has Derek."

"You really don't know Meredith at all. What did Derek tell you about the shooting?"

"He told me that Cristina saved his life."

"She did. With Meredith's help. They both were in the hall when Gary Clark first approached Derek. They saw him shoot Derek, and they ran to save his life. They got him into the OR."

"And he survived."

"You don't know what happened in the o.r., do you?" Owen said. Amelia refused to meet his eyes and continued looking at her food.

"I know Cristina saved his life."

"Yes, with Gary Clark holding a gun to her head. I walked in the O.R. and saw him there. Cristina had asked Meredith and April to wait outside, but Meredith saw me go in and followed me. She saw Gary Clark threatening to shoot Derek again, while he was on the table. I will never forget what she did. She told Gary Clark to shoot her, not Derek. That if he wanted an eye for an eye, if he thought Derek killed his wife, he should shoot her, not Derek. And then Derek flatlined, and Meredith thought he was dead. She was totally destroyed."

"But Derek survived."

"Because Jackson had removed the leads so it looked like he flatlined. Meredith thought he was dead, which made it completely believable to Gary Clark, so he moved on and left the room. Then Cristina finished the surgery. I'm sure Meredith will never forget what it felt like to see Derek die."

"I didn't know. And Meredith didn't say anything."

"Just like she doesn't know you, you don't know her. And, although Meredith and I have our differences, there's no question that she loves your brother."

"That I know. They've been spending a lot of time reconnecting, loudly. I wish Derek had soundproofed their bedroom."

"You can always stay with me."

"Sounds like a good idea," said Amelia with a smile.


	2. Chapter 2

Bailey saw Amelia writing her post-op notes at the nursing station. "Have you heard from your brother?"

"Me? No way."

"Meredith's freaking out. With the plane crash and Derek missing, she's in full panic mode."

"I'm sure Derek's fine."

"But he missed his meeting at the White House. That's not like him."

Amy looked up at Bailey. "You're right. That's not like my brother. He doesn't miss important meetings. Work is usually number one for him. I'll try and call him." Bailey nodded. She had completed her mission, getting Amelia to call her brother.

Amelia went into her office for privacy. She was nervous as she called her brother. She couldn't imagine why he hadn't gone to the meeting or at least called his wife. They had been doing so well together lately. The phone rang four times, but finally it stopped ringing.

"Amy?"

"Yes, Derek, it's me. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm going to be fine."

Amy found the "going to be" language troubling. "Your wife is freaking out. Why haven't you called her?"

"Just tell Meredith I'm fine. I moved my meeting till tomorrow, so I'll be home tomorrow night."

Now Amy was suspicious. "Why don't you talk to your wife?"

"I need to talk to her in person."

"Derek, what did you do?"

"Nothing."

"If it's nothing, you would be calling your wife." Amy said, thinking logically.

"Well, it's not what I did. I did nothing. Just tell Meredith I'm fine and I'll be home tomorrow."

"I can't do that unless I know what's going on."

"Amy, I know you. You can't keep a secret."

"Oh, yes I can. I never told you that I knew Addie and Mark were getting it on." Amy thought to herself, and I never told you that I had a baby, a brainless baby who died. I can really keep a secret.

"Amy, you knew about Addie and Mark?" Derek sounded shocked.

"Yes, and I kept it a secret."

"You're my sister, not hers."

"It was after you left for Seattle. You already knew about it."

"Still Addie let me think it was a one-night thing for a long time. I would never have gone back to her if I'd known. It would have been nice if you told me."

"Not my job. Anyway, I have proven I can keep a secret."

"I guess so."

"Derek, what happened?"

"I'm at G.W. hospital. I'm going to be discharged tomorrow morning. I'll go to the White House for my meeting, and then I'm flying home."

"Why are you at the hospital?" Amy asked, worried.

"I'm fine."

"What happened? If you were fine, you would have been discharged already, you know, you are a doctor."

"Amy, you can't tell Meredith. And that means you can't tell anyone, not even Owen. I want to tell her myself."

"Okay. I won't tell anyone."

"I was working on my final report late last night, and I was stabbed."

Amy was shocked. Images of her father being shot went through her mind. "Stabbed?"

"Yes. My lung was punctured, but I'm going to be totally fine. They just to observe me for a full day, and I'll be on my way tomorrow morning. I don't want Meredith getting on plane to come here."

"Don't worry about that. I don't think Meredith is getting on a plane anytime soon."

"Why not?"

"Today the e.r. got some survivors from a small plane crash. I think it brought back bad memories for Meredith and Arizona."

Derek sighed audibly. "Is Meredith okay?"

"She's frantic worrying about you. Can I bring her the phone?"

"No, I want to talk to her in person."

"Why the secrecy around a stabbing? It's not your fault you were stabbed." Amy waited for Derek to respond, but the silence was telling. "Oh no, it was your fault you were stabbed. Who stabbed you?"

"My research fellow."

"Your research fellow?"

"Yes."

"What happened?"

"I think she had a crush on me. And when she saw me last night finishing up the report, she stabbed me."

"Derek, there's more to this story than you're telling me."

"Well, that's why I want to tell Meredith in person."

"Don't tell me you cheated on Meredith."

"I didn't cheat on Meredith."

"You're sure? Nothing inappropriate happened?"

"I didn't cheat on my wife. When I realized Rene had a crush on me, I came home to work on my marriage. And that's what I've been doing. And I don't want to jeopardize my marriage."

"Well, I think you need to talk to her now. She's frantic, she having PTSD, and she needs to speak to you. So get over yourself and call your wife. I will tell her that I spoke to you and that you seem to be fine, you're coming home tomorrow, and I told you to call her. If you love her, call her."

"I'll think about it. But some things are better to talk about in person. And I can't tell her anything without telling her everything. So just tell her I love her, and I'll be home tomorrow night."

"Okay. But call her."


	3. Chapter 3

Derek stared at the ceiling. But it was a boring hospital ceiling. He knew he should call his wife. But he knew he could count on Amy to let her know that he was okay. And he just couldn't imagine telling her what had happened over the phone. But he also couldn't imagine telling her in person. It was so much easier to stay in his hospital bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking of the mess he made of his life.

Meanwhile, in Seattle, Amelia was looking for Meredith. She spotted Bailey going into O.R. 1. "Bailey, have you seen Meredith?"

"No, not since I relieved her from surgery. Did you reach Derek?"

"Yes, he's okay." Amelia figured that okay was within the acceptable bounds of truth. Compared with serious neurological damage, Derek was doing well, and he was going to be fine.

"He better be. And I hope there was no funny business going on. You should have heard Meredith yesterday, when we watched Catherine Avery reattaching that man's penis. She said that when she thought your brother was cheating on her, she was mad, two trauma surgeons and an orthopod mad."

"Derek loves Meredith," Amelia answered.

"I know that. I was there in the beginning. But love doesn't stop men from doing foolish things."

"My brother's a good guy."

"Glad you think so, given how he treated you."

"Well, he's my brother. He practically raised me. And he saved my life twice."

"That's good. He saved my ex-husband's life once, too. Anyway, you should find Meredith and tell her he's alive."

"Will do." Amelia looked at all the , and then she looked at all the on-call rooms. Finally, she saw Alex in the hall, coming out of surgery. "Have you seen Meredith?"

"Not recently. Last time I saw her, I think she was going into a supply closet."

"A supply closet?"

"Yes. And you may find Arizona with her. I booted her out of surgery, too."

"Yeah, I heard you telling Owen that."

Amelia went on to look at supply closets, and finally she found Meredith and Arizona sitting in a supply cabinet, both teary eyed.

"I found you, Meredith."

"Yes, you did."

"I reached Derek. He's okay. You don't have to worry about him. He said he'll be back tomorrow."

"He hasn't called. Why hasn't he called?"

"I don't know. I told him to call you."

"And he's going to get on a plane tomorrow. I don't want him to fly."

"Meredith, what choice does he have? Driving 3,000 miles is much riskier than flying."

"Maybe he should take the train."

"Train crash, too."

"Thanks a lot, Amelia."

"Look, Meredith, I know you're scared, but Derek's going to be fine. He survived a shooting and a plane crash. He's tough."

"Lexie and Mark were tough, too, and they're gone."

"I miss them, too," said Arizona.

"Me, too," said Amelia.

"You didn't even know Lexie."

"I worked with her once. She had Derek wrapped around her fingers. He loved being her big brother."

"He loves being your big brother, too, Amy."

"I know. And as his sister, I'm telling you he is going to be fine."

"But why hasn't he called? Do you know why?" Meredith noticed that Amy wasn't meeting her eyes. "You know something, don't you?"

"I don't know anything."

"Yes, I'm sure you do. Is it something to do with his research assistant?"

"Research assistant?"

"Yeah, the woman who answered his phone the last time I looked for him."

"All I know is that he's coming home tomorrow night. He had to move his meeting with the White House to tomorrow. He'll be home. You can talk to him tomorrow."

"Amelia, you're a terrible liar. You know something, I'm sure of it, and it's not good."

"I know Derek loves you, Meredith, and I know he's okay. And he's coming home tomorrow. Why don't you and Arizona get out of the closet and go to the day care? I'm sure seeing your kids will make you both feel better."

"Sofia lost her father in the accident," said Arizona. "I'm sure that I'll think of Mark when I see her."

"But she has two mothers who love her," said Meredith. "And that's two more than I had."

"I'm sure your mother loved you," said Amelia.

"You never met my mom. Derek did. It was enough to send him running from me. She really didn't like the fact that he went to see her because he was my boyfriend." Meredith chuckled. "She expected that I would have found an expert in Alzheimer's for her, not a neurosurgeon to love me."

"Well, Derek loves you. And so do Zola and Bailey. So you should both go to the daycare center and hang out with your kids. You're really very lucky," said Amelia, thinking of her unicorn baby.

"I know that. I just hope their father comes home tomorrow, and that I don't strangle him."

"Callie didn't kill me, and I don't see you killing Derek no matter what he did. Zola and Bailey need him," said Arizona.

"He's a great dad, that's for sure."

"You've both been keeping me up with your reconnecting, so I think there's a lot more than him being a great dad. He should have built thicker walls."

"He thought we'd be done with taking in strays when we moved to the house in the woods."

"Don't you think you'll traumatize your kids when you're so loud?"

"That's why their bedrooms are on the other side of the house."

"But then why is the guest room near your room?"

"Good question. Ask Derek."

"I will." Amelia turned to leave.

"You and Owen should come over for dinner," said Meredith. "I don't want to be alone with the kids. Not when I'm thinking about plane crashes. And Derek's going to be taking a plane tomorrow."

"You're okay with me and Owen?"

"Sure. You should just know that he wants kids. Cristina didn't."

"Okay. Good to know, although it's a little early to think about kids."


	4. Chapter 4

Derek was still staring at the ceiling when he heard a knock at the door, and two police officers entered. They were both good-looking African-American men, one about forty and one in his 20s.

"Dr. Shepherd, I'm Frank Kaye," said the older one, "and my partner is Greg Davis. We're here to talk to you about the stabbing last night. We arrested Rene Collier this morning, just before she was about to board a flight to Paris. We need to discuss what happened in greater detail.

"I'm not sure I want to pursue this."

"Dr. Shepherd, I know it's embarrassing, but it's not your fault that you got stabbed."

"To be honest, it feels that way."

"Dr. Shepherd, a person has to be very disturbed to stab another human being. Now, you're married right?"

"Yes."

"Well, in my experience, the type of person who would do this type of crime could become a stalker and could harm your family."

"My family is in Seattle."

"I understand that," said Office Kaye. "But it's easy enough to get a plane to Seattle. The distance doesn't protect you from a stalker."

"Dr. Shepherd, we went to Collier's apartment, and we found photos of your wife and children. It's very concerning to us that she had those photos. We think it's very important to prosecute Collier for your family's safety."

"I'll do whatever it takes for my family's safety. But I have to tell my wife about this."

"Yes, you better tell your wife soon," emphasized Officer Kaye. "This is going to be a front page story in the Washington Post, and it will hit the internet tonight. It's a juicy story for the press, love struck research assistant knifes NIH researcher."

Derek groaned. "I want to be famous for my work, not for a madwoman going after me."

"No victim likes to be part of a big news story."

"I'm supposed to go to the White House tomorrow."

"Did you tell them about this incident?"

"No."

"Call the White House first, your wife second."

"Thanks for the recommendation."

"And I want you to come to the arraignment, tomorrow, 9 a.m. I'll come and pick you up at 8. The doctor said you're being discharged then."

"Okay. I have a flight to Seattle at 11 a.m."

"You may need a later flight, but you can go home. We'll let you know when we need you for trial."

"Okay."

"Thank you, Dr. Shepherd. We'll see you tomorrow."

"Good-bye."

Derek called the White House, and the counsel moved the meeting back to NIH. He didn't want Derek showing up at the White House, given the likely press interest in the story. So Derek kept staring at his phone. He decided to call his sister first.

"Hi Amy."

"Have you called Meredith yet?"

"No. But I'm going to call her in a minute. I wanted to talk to you first."

"I'm flattered."

"I need you to be there for Meredith. Can you stay with her tonight?"

"Sure. She invited Owen and me to dinner."

"Good. The police just left. I'm going to have to tell Meredith everything."

"You should do it anyway."

"Well, the story is going to be on the Internet tonight. They've arrested the research assistant. It turns out she had photos of Meredith and the kids in her apartment. They're worried she might do harm to them, not just me. So the story's going to go public."

"I'll be there for Meredith. But I wouldn't be surprised if she's mad at you. Bailey told me that when she thought you were cheating on her, she was really mad, two trauma surgeons and an orthopod mad."

"Meredith won't hurt me."

"I know. She loves you. I don't know why."

"Amy, you love me, too."

"You're my brother, I have to love you."

"I love you too, Amy." Derek smiled. "Now I have to call Meredith. Do you know where she is?"

"She was going to hang out in the daycare center for a while."


	5. Chapter 5

Meredith and Arizona sat companionably watching their children.

"I don't think Zola remembers the plane crash," murmured Meredith. "She doesn't remember Lexie. and Lexie adored her."

"Sofia doesn't remember Mark. We show her videos and photos, so she knows who he is, but she was too young."

"They were both too young. And Bailey never met Mark or Lexie."

"I like to think they're watching, along with my brother," said Arizona.

"Yes, that's comforting." Meredith nodded. She thought of meeting Denny, Doc, and her mother when she was technically dead. "They could be keeping an eye out for our children."

"It's great that Sofia and Zola are so close."

"Derek loves see them together. He sometimes says they're Shepherd-Sloan 2.0."

Meredith's phone rang. Meredith smiled, "It's Derek, finally."

"That's good."

"Hi Derek."

"Hi Meredith. Where are you?"

"I'm at the daycare, watching Shepherd-Sloan 2.0 and Bailey."

"What are they up to?"

"Zola and Sofia are playing with puppets, and Bailey's building with Legos. I've been worried about you. Where are you?"

"I'm okay, but I have something private to talk to you about. Maybe it would be a good idea to talk in my office."

Meredith got nervous. Why would be a private matter that he needed to talk to her about? "I'll go to the nearest on-call room." She looked at Arizona, and she said, "I'll be back in a few minutes."

She tried two on-call rooms, but they were occupied, so she wound up in a third on-call room. "Okay, Derek, now tell me what's up."

"Okay, as you probably realize I have some bad news. But the good news is I'm going to be okay."

"What's wrong?"

"Well, I was stabbed."

"When? Where?"

"Last night, and my lung was punctured. I'm in a hospital."

"And why didn't you call me?"

"I didn't want you to worry."

"Derek, I've been worrying about you non-stop since the White House called this morning, and let me know you hadn't shown up. I've called you dozens of times."

"Well, I've been at the hospital getting treated, and I'm going to be fine."

"Okay, but why didn't you call me immediately?"

"I didn't want to worry you. I'll be back tomorrow night."

"Who stabbed you?" Meredith felt like she had to push to get info; she was getting a bad feeling about this.

"Well, I was working on finishing my report at NIH, and a researcher stabbed me."

"Your research assistant?" Meredith asked.

"Yes, Rene Collier."

"Why did she stab you?"

"Because she is very disturbed. That's what the police officers think. I have to go to the arraignment tomorrow morning because they think she's dangerous."

"Well, she did stab you. But why did she stab you?"

"I think she has a crush on me," Derek admitted.

"Did you sleep with her?"

"No. No way." Derek responded immediately and emphatically. Meredith believed him, but she was worried that something had happened. "You remember April had a crush on me. And I never did anything to encourage her crush."

"April was a virgin then. And she knew you were married. She just worshipped you. Did something happen with this research assistant, Derek?"

He was silent. "Tell me the truth, Derek. The whole truth. For me to trust you, you need to tell me the truth."

"Nothing really happened. She had promising research, and we talked about her research. She wanted to learn about autism because she has a sister who has autism. I acted as her mentor. Her research was exciting."

"What happened, Derek?"

"Meredith, are you sure you didn't go to law school? You're really cross-examining me."

"Derek, tell me the truth. I'm your wife. I'm a big girl. I can handle the truth." Meredith shook. She wasn't sure she could handle the truth, but she needed to let Derek think she could.

"So before I came home, she made a big step with her research, we were both excited about it, and she kissed me. That's when I decided to come home. She kissed me, and I told her I loved my wife, and I went straight to the airport. I left both my keys and my phone there because I was in a rush to get home."

"She kissed you. Did you kiss her back?" Meredith asked quietly.

"Meredith, it was just a kiss."

"You kissed her back."

"Meredith, I broke off the kiss, and I told her I was married, and you were everything to me. And I immediately headed home."

"You were so freaked out you left your keys and phone behind."

"I love you, Meredith. I came home to work on our marriage. And I'm coming home tomorrow."

"Why do the police think she's dangerous?"

"She stabbed me, for one thing."

"And the other thing?"

"She had photos of you and the kids in her apartment."

"So Zola, Bailey, and I are in danger because you were flirting with your research assistant?"

"Meredith, this is not my fault. She is a disturbed woman. And she's been arrested, and I'm going to the arraignment tomorrow. I think she'll be put away for a long time."

"You let her kiss you."

"Meredith. It was just one kiss. You shouldn't freak out about one kiss."

"I don't like you kissing other women. I didn't like it when you kissed Rose, and I don't like you kissing your research assistant."

"But I immediately went home to you."

"But you didn't tell me she kissed you. You didn't tell me the truth."

"Meredith, I told you I came home to work on our marriage. I came home for you. I'll do whatever it takes to prove to you I love you."

"Stop kissing other women would be a good start."

"I'm not going to kiss any other women."

"That's what I thought after you broke up with Rose."

"Meredith, it was just one kiss. And I love you. You're everything to me."

"You have a funny way of showing it.." Meredith decided to change the topic. "I'm going to get an alarm system for our home."

"That's a good idea. I'll be home tomorrow. I love you."

"I'll see you tomorrow." Meredith ended the call. She was determined not to break down, so she went back to daycare. Arizona had left with Sofia, so she gathered Zola and Bailey to head home. She texted Amelia to let her know that she was going and that she hoped she would be joining them for dinner. She needed adult company. She didn't want to be alone with her thoughts.


	6. Chapter 6

Amelia was a little anxious as she opened the door to her bother's dream house. She had thought she would make it home for dinner, but she had wound up having to operate on a trauma case. A kid had a head injury from falling off a tree house, but she was going to be fine. Amelia wasn't sure what she would find. She saw Meredith sitting on the sofa, holding a bottle of tequila.

Meredith greeted her, "Hi Amelia. I put the kids to bed. There's leftover pizza in the kitchen, if you want dinner. And I hope you don't mind me drinking. I know you don't drink. But I need to drink."

"That's fine. I understand your need to drink. I'll be the designated babysitter for Zola and Bailey." Amelia went to refrigerator to grab some pizza, and she put heated it up in the microwave.

"Good. I didn't tell them their daddy was stabbed by his love struck research assistant," Meredith murmured.

"That's good. They don't need to know that." Amelia put her pizza on a plate and sat down on the sofa with Meredith.

"And the phone keeps ringing. I've been call screening. Your mom has called three times, and all your sisters have called."

"I'm guessing that you'd like me to answer the calls when they call again."

"Good guess. I don't want to talk to anyone."

Amelia's phone rang, and she answered it, noting it was Addie. "Hi," she whispered.

"Hi Amelia. Nancy emailed me the CNN story. I assume you know Derek was stabbed and it made the national news."

"Yes, I know." Amelia looked at Meredith. She was drinking another shot of tequila.

"Have you spoken with him?"

"Yes, he's going to be fine. He's coming home tomorrow."

"How's Meredith?" Amelia didn't answer. "Is she there?"

"You got it."

"Can I talk to her?"

"Seriously?"

"Sure. I like Meredith. Derek and I are both remarried, with children."

Amelia thought "But you haven't been stabbed." She decided to keep that thought to herself. "I'll ask her." She turned to Meredith, who was staring into her tequila bottle. "Addison asked if you wanted to talk to her."

"Addison wants to talk to me?"

"Sure."

"Right. We now have something in common – Derek having found a love struck younger woman."

"Do you want to talk to her?"

"Sure. Put her on speaker phone."

"Meredith said I should put you on speaker phone. Here's Addie."

"Hi Meredith. I hope you are doing okay."

"That's really kind of you. I told Derek you were really great."

"That was very nice of you."

"Yea, I may have slept with your husband at the prom, but at least I didn't stab anyone."

"Meredith, did Derek . . ."

"He said he only kissed her once. He said he immediately told her that he was married, and he ran out of the lab to the airport. He did forget his phone and his keys, so it's clear that he was acting without much thought. He's a brainless brain surgeon."

Addie laughed. "Derek is definitely brainless. But he ran back to you. That's what's important. Derek ran away from me, going to Seattle."

"And he found me."

"Derek fell in love with you. It hurt me, I'll admit, that he fell so deeply in love with you. But he's been in love with you since before I came to Seattle, and I'm sure he loves you now."

"Have you spoken to him?"

"No."

"Then how do you know?"

"I know. Just the fact he ran home to you shows that he loves you."

"But then he had to go back to NIH to finish his project. Well, at least I'm not a lunatic stalker who knifes people."

"Stalker?"

"Yes, I don't know if they mentioned it on t.v., but the woman has photos of me and our kids in her apartment. The cops are afraid she'll come after us. So Derek may have put us all in danger."

"It's not his fault, you know."

"I like blaming him."

"I know. I get that. Well, if it helps, I've been there. You can always talk to me."

"Thanks, Addison, you're really nicer to me than I deserve."

"I have a husband who loves me and a great son. It all worked out for me."

"I'm happy for you. And your husband doesn't have a love struck research assistant stabbing him."

"No, but he's a fertility doctor, and I've seen some of his patients fall for him. It's not his fault. And it's not Derek's fault this woman saw something that wasn't there."

"I'd feel better if he hadn't kissed her."

"Derek loves you, Meredith," offered Amelia. "Believe me, I've heard you reconnecting."

"I don't need to know about that, Amelia."

"Sorry Addie. I do love my brothers' wives, both of them."

"Thanks" "Thanks" said Meredith and Addie simultaneously.

"Addison, I'll always remember you telling you wanted to kick my ass when Derek was dating her. It was like you wanted me to be with Derek."

"I didn't think he'd be happy with Rose. He was never serious about Rose. And I guess I felt better about our divorce if he wound up with you. Anyway, he loved you. He told me that he was upset that he failed you. That you expected greatness from him."

"I got greatness. The President picked him to be chief of the brain-mapping project. Too bad it was in the wrong Washington."

"I'm sure Derek will have enough work here," said Amelia. "As Head of Neurosurgery, I'll make sure he's busy."

"Yes, keep him busy. That way he won't have time for love struck interns. Did I ever tell you about how April had a crush on him?"

"Well, April loves Jackson, so you have nothing to worry about," said Amelia.

"I've got to go. Henry's crying. Take care, Meredith."

"Thanks. Maybe Amelia will invite you to visit, and we'll finally meet Henry and Jake."

"Maybe. I'd like to meet Zola and Bailey as well."

"And you've already met Sofia."

"Yes," Addie said softly. "Mark loved her so much."

"We all miss Mark, Derek especially," said Meredith.

"Me, too," said Amelia.

Meredith gave Amelia a look. Amelia was abashed; she realized that Meredith was thinking that Amelia had slept with Mark.

"I know he loved Lexie," said Amelia. Amelia had never thought that Mark was the one for her; she had just thought it would be fun to have sex with Mark, given his reputation as a man-whore. Her older sisters had raved about him as a lover, and she learned they were right. But she knew that Mark's heart wasn't hers.

"Yes, he did," said Addie. "But I found Jake, who is perfect for me. Anyway, Henry needs me. So take care, and call me, Meredith, if you want to complain about Derek. I'm happy to commiserate with you."

After Addie hung up, Meredith looked at Amelia and said, "That was weird. Talking to Derek's ex-wife about Derek, when we cheated on her."

"Derek was the cheater, not you. You weren't married. And Addie doesn't hold a grudge. She likes you."

"Well, I don't like Rene Collier."

Amelia looked puzzled.

"The love struck research assistant who stabbed your brother."

"You're nothing like her."

"You don't know. I was pretty love struck with your brother when I first dated him."

"You're not the kind of person who would stab someone unless they were attacking you or threatening someone else."

"Glad you think that . . . "

The house phone rang, interrupting them. Amelia answered it, "Hi Mom, Derek's fine. He'll be home tomorrow. Meredith's okay. The kids are great."

"Good to hear your voice. What have you told the kids?"

"Of course we didn't tell them anything."

"It might be hard for you, you weren't much older when Dad died."

"But I was there and Dad died. Zola was here, 3,000 miles from the incident. And Derek is fine. All is well. Anyway, I've got to go."

"I guess Meredith probably doesn't want to talk now."

"You've got it. I'll give her your regards. Love you." Amelia hung up after her mother responded. "That was Mom. She sends her regards."

"I would like to go into a cave and hide. Millions of people now know my husband's research assistant stabbed him." Meredith devoured another shot of tequila.

"I think you've probably had enough liquor. How about we have ice cream sundaes? That way I can eat with you."

"Sure. Eating would be good. I hope we have strawberry ice cream."

"I'm sure we do."

The phone rang again. Amelia checked caller-id. "It's Cristina Yang."

"Please give me the phone." Amelia handed her the phone, and Meredith answered,

"Hi Cristina. It's the crack of dawn in Switzerland."

"Yes. I get up early sometimes. And I learned McDreamy was stabbed on CNN.

"Not so McDreamy."

"The story on CNN just says his research assistant stabbed him. What did he do?"

"He kissed her," Meredith murmured, helping herself to yet another shot of tequila.

"Just a kiss."

"That's what he says. Should I trust him?"

"He doesn't lie."

"Did you forget that he forgot to mention he was married when he tried to get me to out with me after we met?"

"No. That wasn't a lie. He just didn't tell you the whole truth."

"That's comforting."

"Sarcasm is not your strength. Leave it to me. Anything I can do to help?"

"No. Amelia's going to make me an ice cream sundae. I've been drinking tequila. I'm going to stop now though. I'm going to go to work tomorrow."

"Okay. I have some vacation coming, so maybe I should come and visit or you can come here."

"See you would be great. Take care."

"Good-bye."

Meredith looked at Amelia. "Okay, I'll get started on the sundaes now that you're done with the call."

"Good. I'm really looking forward to the sundae."


	7. Chapter 7

Derek hated being in criminal court. He kept thinking back to the first he was in criminal court, when he went to testify at the trial of the two men who murdered his dad. He had felt guilty then, survivor's guilt, that somehow he had been there and had not been able to help his dad. He had been glad to give his testimony, to have the two men go away for life although it wasn't fair that they got life and his father had gotten death. He had felt good to know he helped to get his father get justice. But now Derek felt guilty that he had let his research assistant develop a crush on him and that he had even let it go as far as a kiss. He feared Meredith would never forgive him.

Derek was glad that the court officer had taken his phone from him. Phones were not allowed in court. He had a good excuse now for not answering the dozens of calls he had gotten after the story hit the news last night. He figured his family would call Amelia if he didn't call them back, and he felt bad about putting her in that situation, particularly since he was also counting on her to be there for Meredith, not to mention Zola and Bailey. He was surprised that Addison had called. For some reason, he kept thinking of her arrival in Seattle, and he kept coming back to her comment about Meredith "She seems sweet, she's young, she's got the whole wide-eyed he's a brain surgeon thing going." Was he that shallow that he had been attracted to Renee because she had the whole wide-eyed he's a brain surgeon thing going?

Derek watched one defendant after another being arraigned in court. Finally, he saw Renee come into court. Her lawyer had obviously gotten her a suit to wear; she looked pretty presentable for someone who had been in jail all night. The cop sat down next to him. The judge called her name. Derek watched the arraignment with interest. The cop told him all he needed to do was sit and watch.

The judge called the Renee's name, and Derek observed Renee and her lawyer take their places in the court. Renee's lawyer was a distinguished man with silver hair, probably in his 60s. The public defender, in contrast, was a young woman, probably not even thirty. She was wearing a suit, at last, although it didn't fit her well. Derek frowned; he realized that his salary as a surgeon was many times more than the young lawyer's. Although he enjoyed fine clothes and cherished his European suits, he should have learned long ago that clothes were unimportant. He smiled as he thought about the contrast between Addison in her designer duds and Meredith in jeans and a Dartmouth t-shirt.

The judge asked, "What do we have here?"

The prosecutor whose name was Mary Williams, said, "We have charged Ms. Collier with violation of D.C. Criminal Code Section 22-404-01, aggravated assault. Ms. Collier stabbed her boss, Dr. Shepherd, with a knife, puncturing his lung. She had purchased a ticket for Paris when we picked her up, so she is a flight risk. We are asking that she be held without bail."

Then the Renee's lawyer spoke, "Renee Collier is well-respected research scientist. She has connections to the community. She is pleading not guilty. She will surrender her passport and she is willing to be confined to her apartment and wear a monitor. She doesn't belong in jail. We're asking that she be held with a $100,000 bail."

The judge then spoke: "I don't think she's so well-respected now her photo is all over the Washington Post for being arrested in connection with Dr. Shepherd's stabbing. I will set bail of $2,000,000, and require an ankle monitor and confinement to home if she gets out on bail."

The judge then called the next case.


End file.
